Are Pictures Really Worth A Thousand Words!

I decided early on when finding my real family, that I did not want to meet my possible real father. I only wanted to know what he looked like so that I could put the face with the image in my mind.

 

The plan:
Take a ride to his business location that is a public place and request the service that he offers.
It wouldn't be me that requested the service, but someone that would be with me, so that I could snap the picture while they interacted as I sat in the car.

 

The outcome:
Due to an acquaintance of his, I did not have to go through with my plan because it was done for me in a way that was not expected or asked, although I am grateful for the assistance!

 

The reaction:
I have no feelings about him, no connection, and no intentions of ever interacting with this man.

 

The reason:
When I saw the picture, I realized he may be my real father, but he is not my image of my real father.

 

The image:

• My real father is a stand up man with strength and inspires me.
• He has the distinguished look of a proud man that loves all is kids no matter where they are.
• He is an investigator for the ones that he lost touch with but knows they exist and makes every effort to make a reunion with them.
• He is a hard worker but still finds the time to pick up the phone to check on his kids at least once a week.
• He admits when he is wrong and shows remorse for allowing a child to be given away and then going on with his life like she never existed.

 

The conclusion:

• I am blessed to have a person that was able to actually be face to face with this man.
• I have no feelings for him whatsoever.
• I can genuinely say that after seeing the picture, my heart did not feel like I need to reach out to him regardless of his success, health, or possible feelings of emptiness.

 

Final thoughts:

1. I do not feel heartless.
2. I do not feel like he owes me 18 years of support.
3. I do not feel that I owe him the right to see me through my efforts to locate him.
4. I do not feel we will ever cross paths to create an awkward reunion.

 

1. I do feel that I have and will cross paths with one or more of his children that he created after or before me.
2. I do feel that, as siblings, it is only right to know who we all are to each other before we leave this earth. (unfortunately the oldest is deceased I was told)
3. I do feel that I have closure in regards to the face verses the image of the man that is suppose to be my real father.

 

I DO FEEL THAT A PICTURE IS ONLY WORTH 484 WORDS!